Out Rage
At the risk of beginning with a polemic, do we want our children to grow up to be thoughtful, insightful, balanced, ready to consider another point of view, or would we prefer that as adults our kids be angry, out of control, annoyed at every little slight real or imagined, with a short fuse, always a few minutes from exploding into incoherence and uncontrolled sputtering.
There is certainly enough to shake our heads and shake our fingers at in 2025. Did you hear about the woman who is teaching her children that the Earth is flat? Did you hear about those folks in the small town who don’t want solar panels because they’re concerned that the sun will run out of energy? Did you hear about those parents who won’t give their children vaccinations against measles, mumps, and rubella because they think that… Well, it’s hard to say exactly what they think. Something about surveillance or aliens.
It is almost as if there is something reassuring and pleasing for adults to throw up their hands in exasperation, exclaiming “what is wrong with people?” and “how could anybody be so ill-informed?” A combination of schadenfreude and these-are-the-worst-of-times! Unprecedented! I can barely cope!
I am as exasperated as the next curmudgeon at the poor choices people make. I’m especially saddened by abusive parenting, wish I could do more to keep kids safe. But at 68, I am pretty much able to get on with my life. I make contributions where I can—to charitable organizations or the blood drive. After I’ve done what I can do, I cuddle up with my wife and kids on the couch or at a campsite. Whereas little children are not yet ready to wrap their heads around the possibility that the world is going to heck in a handbasket, that they themselves are unsafe, that weirdness lurks around every corner. There are enough imaginary monsters under the bed without their parents supplying actual monsters in their real world. Young ones need to feel safe and protected. If they see fire coming out of their parents’ eyes, the kids worry that they will get burned.
Wouldn’t it be better to calmly communicate “those people have their point of view?” and “I’m certainly going to take care of my kids”? Your children learn what they live. Kids model volatility. Or calm. As the case may be.
It is often said: You can’t change them. You can only change you. The next step is to change your reaction. Inanity and insanity have been around for a while and will certainly outlive this author. Speaking of this author, I have been guilty in these columns of raising alarms, pointing fingers. In future, I will emphasize how to do what’s right by our beloved children, without venting outrage regarding the flat earthers, anti-vaxxers, and history-deniers out there. I promise instead to emphasize what we can do right, focus less on what other parents are doing wrong.
